Choosing a best man can be an absolute nightmare! If you don’t have one clearcut best mate then how the heck are you supposed to decide? Do you choose the one you think will make the best speech? Although the best speech for a Best Man tends to be the one that humiliates you the most… not sure I like that plan! The friend you trust to deliver the rings safely? Or is it more a case of which friend is most likely to be carrying a handy bag of Haribo rings for when they realise they’ve left them at home? Or is it the one most likely to leave you alive at the Stag Party? Knowing my friends that outcome seems relatively unlikely whoever I’d chosen!
There is another possibility though… what about having best MEN in the plural? Is it a great way to share the responsibility between your closest friends or is it just double trouble? Let’s settle this in the traditional way… it’s time for a two Vs one handicap bout!
Best Man Vs Best Men!
In the Red corner, with eyes for only one man… though it bloomin’ well better not be the Best Man, “Best” or not! The Best Man’s speech is one of her favourite parts of a wedding and confesses to nearly having dropped her camera laughing at a fair few, It’s Dom “The Tog” Bride.
In the Blue corner, bringing his posse along for the ride, he eventually had to rule “Man’s best friend” Small Dog out of the running to be Best Man (despite our furry friend’s best puppy dog eyes!) after realising that Small Dog feels obliged to pee on every lamppost he sees regardless of whether any members of the stag party happen to be tied to it in a compromising position… It’s Matt “The Gormless” Groom
Dom: Having just one best man is traditional for a reason. The best man is the person trusted to look after the groom and make sure he gets (reasonably) safely to the wedding! It’s a huge honour to be a best man, and splitting the responsibility delineates that a little. Having your close friends as ushers is great and still a position of responsibility within the wedding, but the clue’s in the title Best MAN!
Matt: Sometimes choosing a best man is clear cut, it’s your best mate. But loads of blokes don’t have just one best friend! Personally I have a group of a few friends that I’ve grown up with who I consider to all be my best mates. Choosing between them would be impossible, and whoever I didn’t pick would be bound to feel like I don’t consider them as close a friend as whoever I did pick.
Dom: Having more than one Best Man confuses things… who hands over the rings? Who gives the speech? Who organises the dreaded stag party?
Matt: Two heads are better than one! I’ve seen some great joint speeches and as for the rest of the duties I think it’s just a question of either letting them sort it out between themselves or, perhaps for things like the rings, asking whoever you think is best for that particular job to take care of it! Having more people thinking about the best man responsibilities should make sure you’re better covered! Three people forgetting the rings is less likely than one!
Dom: A well planned double act may work well for the speech, but when more than one best man gives an individual speech it can easily drag and go on for too long. Delivering an entertaining speech is a key Best Man responsibility, the last thing you want is for the guests to end up bored!
Matt: If your best men are friends themselves then I think that a double act can work brilliantly and is often funnier than just one person doing a monologue! If you give some guidelines as to how long the speech can be and suggest they work together then you can avoid the speeches going on too long. It can also be quite nice if one does a more serious speech and the other is responsible for a bit of comedy. It also helps with the odds that one of your best men will be a good speech maker!
Dom: Choosing two best men may actually leave your other friends feeling even more left out: “You mean I’m not even one of your top two?!” It may not be easy to choose just one, but it’s often easier to justify choosing one person than explaining why you chose two best men out of three or four possibles!
Matt: Your various different friends will each know different things about you that the other might not which can help when planning the stag do and putting the speech together… hang on, I think I’ve just pointed out a negative!!!
Dom: Having one best man is traditional and puts the responsibility firmly in your chosen man’s lap! He is your trusted compadre, your official backup, one of the most recognisable figures of the wedding party. He will be beside you at the head of the aisle as you await your bride, and your right-hand man in the wedding photos. Having more than one best man makes the responsibility unclear and leaves people wondering who the best man really is.
Matt: If you don’t have just one clear-cut best man then why not share the responsibility a bit! Having more people responsible for looking after things gives you a little bit more safety: if the Best Man was unwell or delayed or something you have someone else taking care of things. They can work together to make sure everything works brilliantly, and if they achieve a comedy double-act it’s a real talking point for the guests!
Are you having more than one best man at your wedding? Are you firmly in the camp one best man camp? Join the debate! Leave your comments below or catch us on twitter and let us know your thoughts!