Generally when we arrive to photograph a Bride getting ready for her day we’re greeted by a flurry of activity as Bridesmaids run around grabbing dresses, putting on makeup and searching for hairpins. Lately though we’ve attended a couple of weddings where the Bride has chosen not to have any official Bridesmaids at all and it got us thinking: is it best to have Bridesmaids or to go it alone?
Let’s find out!
In the Red Corner, fighting to go it alone on your wedding day, she had no official bridesmaids but a veritable entourage of friends helping her get ready for her day, it’s Dom “The Tog Bride”.
In the Blue Corner, arguing on behalf of the Bridesmaids, after all you need someone to walk beside the groomsmen and class them up a little! It’s Matt “The Gormless Groom”
Bridesmaids Vs Going it Alone
Dom: Your friends can still help you in the morning and throughout the day whether they’re Bridesmaids or not and if they’re not officially bridesmaids it makes it easier to have male friends helping out as well.
Matt: But making your friends an official part of the day can help them to really feel included and special and also helps identify them to guests if they have any questions.
Dom: But if you have too many close friends to have them all as Bridesmaids you can end up insulting anyone you don’t include, whereas if there are no official bridesmaids you can include as many people as you want!
Matt: The Bridesmaids are hopefully quite involved in the day and know the schedule and feel a responsibility to make sure everything is running on schedule, particularly in making sure the Bride gets to the ceremony on time!
Dom: But sometimes it’s the Bridesmaids that actually end up delaying the bride as with so many people in one place trying to get ready in one place it can become quite chaotic, particularly if everyone is having their hair and makeup done professionally and if the cars have to do multiple trips to transport the bridesmaids and then the bride herself.
Matt: The Bridesmaids and their look can become an amazing part of your theme and be designed to accentuate the Bride’s look. It’s also incredibly dramatic seeing the Bride arrive flanked by Bridesmaids in their matching outfits.
Dom: It’s so difficult though to find a look that suits all of your bridesmaids and outfits that they’re actually happy to wear. Sometimes when the Bridesmaids aren’t happy with what they’ve been asked to wear it can end up being about them rather than the bride which can really detract from the day. If your girls are free to wear what they want then they’re likely to be more comfortable and relaxed and might even (as in the case of our last Bridesmaid-free wedding) end up colour co-ordinating themselves with some cool outfits that really suit them.
Matt: Whilst your friends will of course want everything to be perfect for you on your day they’re more likely to feel that sense of responsibility to look after your dress, organise guests and do all those other little jobs a bridesmaid automatically takes on if they have an official job to do on the day.
Dom: Buying all those bridesmaid dresses and bouquets and paying for professional hair and makeup is an expensive business, particularly if they may not even be particularly pleased with the result. Not having any bridesmaids can represent a huge saving!
Matt: If they’ve been asked to be bridesmaids your friends are more likely to want to come and get ready with you in the morning and help out, whereas if they have no official role they may want to get ready on their own or with their partner rather than leave their +1’s to their own devices.
So those are our points but where do you stand? Leave a comment to join the debate or simply place your vote below!