‘Tis a curious feeling, being legally married to someone before your actual wedding. As we explained in last week’s extract from the Wedding Diaries, in order to ensure our wedding abroad would be legally binding we were forced to hold a small civil ceremony in the UK before we departed. According to law this ceremony would leave us husband and wife, although in our hearts we would never be so until our actual wedding took place across the seas.
The trouble is that, although we had not exchanged rings and had been quite clear from the outset that this was just a legal ceremony and not a wedding, once we had signed the marriage register it was difficult to deny that something had in some ways changed. Our level of responsibility to each other had been transformed, we were now joined in all things yet we couldn’t truly consider ourselves to be so. But there were more important things to consider…
Whilst we were engaged I used to call Dom “Future Wifey”, a term of endearment that seemed hardly appropriate given the change in our relationship status. So what the heck should I call her now? Not fiancee nor wife, neither Thompson nor Shaw, and so she became a woman of no marital status, of no real surname… instead she became simply Dominique “The Intermediate Wifey”.
Had she been stopped at the airport she may never have made it to La Palma. “Name?” they would ask. “Dominique” she would say, a note of panic in her voice as the inevitable unfolded. “Title?” they would ask… “Erm… School sewing champion 1996?” (raised eyebrows) “Surname?” “…Ah… er…Well I don’t really have one right now.” (Sound of handcuffs being applied to an intermediate Wife).
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Fortunately for us, the question never came up and her only crime was being unable to find a “more or less married-ish” relationship status on Facebook (fear not, we will be writing to Mark Zuckerberg to suggest one imminently). To be honest when they look at her passport photo I’m amazed she gets through anyway so I think she’s grateful she has to change her name just for the chance to update her passport!
And as for Dom? What were her thoughts on having an intermediate husband? Well, she seemed generally unfazed by the prospect save for being unable to decide whether or not to start nagging me about everything… ah well, plenty of time for that after wedding number 2!
Hmm… maybe this intermediate marriage thing isn’t such a bad idea after all! 😉
