At a wedding it’s sometimes difficult to know for sure who each member of the wedding party is. You’re bringing together a lot of different groups and often not even the Bride and Groom know every single guest, so how do you make sure everyone feels welcome? This is where the receiving line steps in.
Although of course you want your guests to mingle and you can do your best to say hello to all of them, the receiving line is often the only chance for the wedding hosts to speak personally to each of their guests. But is it really necessary or just a time consuming delay to everyone getting fed? Let’s see whether we can find the answer…
Receiving Line Vs Greet While You Dine
In the Red Corner, as someone who spends a lot of her time trying to photograph interactions between the Bride and Groom and their guests she’s fighting to keep the traditional receiving line, it’s Dom “The Tog Bride”
In the Blue Corner, finding that even in Britain people aren’t that interested in watching video footage of other people queuing for half an hour, so fighting to abandon the old receiving line, it’s Matt “The Gormless Groom”
FIGHT!!
Dom: As explained in the intro the receiving line gives the bride and groom, and generally their parents, the chance to at least meet absolutely everyone even if it is only briefly. You’re so busy on your wedding day it’s often difficult to get round and see everyone, and a lot of people will have travelled a fair old distance to be there so surely they deserve a friendly hello!
Matt: Of course you want to see everyone but is the receiving line really the best way to do it? All the guests have to queue up for ages and most of the time there’s only time for a quick handshake – the guests will generally try to say hello to the bride and groom at some stage in the evening whether a line-up takes place or not and that way you get to speak to them fully rather than just a brief and rather formal hello.
Dom: The receiving line is a traditional part of the wedding – it’s a way for the hosts to personally thank everyone for turning up and is generally considered a very polite thing to do. In fact some would consider it rude not to be welcomed into the venue by the hosts.
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Matt: The receiving line seems like one of those traditions that was started very much in a time when that was the done thing at any formal party and everyone would be introduced by a doorman. Times have changed and some traditions just aren’t relevant in the modern world.
Dom: But traditions like that make it feel even more like the grand, lavish affair your wedding deserves to be! The formal introductions make it feel like you’re arriving at a royal ball or stepping straight into a page of ‘Pride and Prejudice’!
Matt: The introductions are extremely time consuming at a time when everyone just wants to go sit down and eat. It’s not the best time to be introducing yourself when you’re tired and hungry and desperate to sit down, eat, drink and be merry again!
Dom: The receiving line is one of those important duties for the mother and father of the bride/groom and helps them to feel a key and important part of your special day – particularly as it’s generally only the father of the bride who has a formal role to play in the wedding.
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Matt: But who should be included in the line-up? Is it just parents and the Bride and Groom or should it also be Bridesmaids and Groomsmen? Surely the Maid of Honour and the best-man are important enough that they should be included? If you’re not careful you can end up with half the total wedding party greeting the few remaining guests just in order not to offend anyone! It’s more like the handshakes at the beginning of a football match than an actual greeting!
Dom: Some of the young kids and the more elderly guests often leave earlier and the receiving line ensures you do get a chance to say hello to them and thank them for coming before they disappear. Otherwise you often don’t get chance.
Matt: It’s so difficult to predict how long the receiving line is going to take and it can be a real nightmare for the caterers. If you start off with too long a greeting it’s hard to cut the time down without offending anyone but meanwhile the food might be going cold and being ruined because you’re over-running.
So those are our points but what do you think? Is a receiving line still a relevant idea in the modern world or just a waste of time? Leave your comments below to join the debate!
I am definitely with Matt on this one! Bang on about being like the handshakes at the start of a football game! I haaaaaate receiving lines! As a guest it’s soooo awkward! What are you supposed to say to the groom who you don’t really know let alone his parents?! God it’s so cringey I would rather hide away and wait for it to end and then sneak in than go through. And you have to QUEUE for the privilege!! No ways man! That is one tradition that I would gladly see the back of!
I’m in the blue corner on this one – if you’re having a large wedding your guests should really appreciate and understand that it’s your big day, you simply can’t afford to spend all that time with the receiving line. Like you say elderly guests and children will be leaving early – so lets get on with the speeches, the food, the cake and the dancing!
If a guest feels aggrieved that a bride or groom didn’t come and say hello during the day then they need to realise that there are other guests! It’s not their day.
Having said that, if it’s an intimate wedding with something like 40-60 guests and time permits, then perhaps set aside 15 – 30 minutes for a receiving line.