Upon my return to Baker Street I was met by an intriguing site. Holmes, exhausted perhaps from another night sniffing out the eternal mysteries known only to the intricate and inexplicable weavings of this master of the unexplainable’s brain lay asleep on his preferred seat by the fireplace. In the centre of the room, illuminated by the glowing embers was something altogether less expected: A suitcase.
As I pondered the object Mrs. Hudson-Shaw burst suddenly into the room. “Thank goodness I caught you, you mustn’t open the case!” She exclaimed. She informed me that the object had been left by one matching the last known description of Holmes and I’s arch nemesis Dominique Moriarty with explicit instructions that I specifically not be allowed to inspect the contents.
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I attempted to wake my old friend. “Holmes”, I said, “just what the blazes is this suitcase business all about?” Stirring briefly he gave me a trademark look of bored disdain before returning to his slumber. Clearly this was not a case deemed worthy of the concern of the detective famously involved in the investigation into four missing sausage rolls.
Having spent many years observing the often eccentric but nonetheless brilliant deductive process of Paddington Holmes I was not without deductive qualities myself. I decided there and then that if Holmes would not take the case I must take it upon myself to investigate the contents.
From prior experience I knew Moriarty to be a most dangerous foe and one never to be taken lightly. If she had insisted I should not open the case there must be a reason, mostly likely some form of booby trap. I must use Holmes skills to work out the contents without opening the case. My interest intensified as I inspected the case from every angle.
.jpg "The Mysterious Case of the Mysterious Case")
This particular suitcase was well cared for, a sure sign that the contents may indeed by precious. Giving the slightest of shakes I noted that it had no rattle – either it was packed tight and full, potentially unlikely given the relatively low overall weight of the object, or it was of an altogether softer material than your typical dynamite, a deduction that gave me some hope that our demise was not necessarily imminent. The zip however was well worn, far more than the rest of the bag. Fresh marks around the handle and recent scuffs to the back of the case confirmed my suspicion that the case had been often opened and closed in recent times, as if someone had been checking the contents over and over… the plot thickened!
The container was small; hand baggage, an unlocked travel padlock still present suggesting that the contents were precious enough to be secured even when in the hands of the owner. But what could be precious enough to warrant such care? A weapon? Not Moriarty’s style. I needed more info. The style: modern – suitable for a current holiday for one keen to look good. The colour: green – indicative of the fact that the owner had bought a green suitcase. Still the final piece of evidence eluded me, I felt sure Holmes would know but my pride prevented me from begging for the answer.
Moving around to the back of the case once more something white caught my eye for the first time lying on the floor: a piece of paper. from its facedown orientation and position on the floor away from the door it appeared the paper had been blown over by the draft caused by my entering the room. On it in psychopathically large lettering were the words
“Dom’s Wedding Dress! DO NOT OPEN!!!”
But what did this cryptic wording mean? Taking the first and last letters of each word I hoped to find the meaning of this random code. It spelt the words Dswgds! Don’t on!!! Apparently this code was beyond my limited decoding abilities.
I must persuade Holmes to arise and solve this most mystifying of tales. For surely only he could uncover Moriarty’s mysterious purpose…
“Holmes… wake up!” I cried. “Holmes… come on boy… would you like a choccy drop?” GOOD DETECTIVE!!!
And so, with the great detective awake it was time to solve this mystery once and for all. The casebook was open once again for…
The Mysterious case of the Mysterious Case.
